Is It love or just effectuation?

Well my question will surely appear baseless to yah coz its related to girl I love and for my worst luck she appeares to be only in cyber world,many miles away from me!!!!! Well we started out as friends an year ago.But as time progressed, I felt I had some sort of inner connection with her.Day by day,I grew so drawn towards her.I have never been in such type of situation before.She dominated my thoughts each and every moment.And then suddenly wisdom dawned upon me.I was in love. :( Well but it isn't an easy task to confess atleast coz she plainly said to me once in normal course of conversation that she ain't believes in net relationships.So I generally kept quiet pretending different and quite contrary whenever we would get into an argument regarding love,relationships and all such stuff just like normal friends do. well I do gave indirect hints to her about what I felt for her but she would either change the topic or would turn suspicious and serious. So immediately I had to resort to clumsy and unusual ways to get off her mind the impact that my confession would cause.Perhaps that was my biggest mistake. She labeled and conceptualized about me as a flirter.!!!!!!!!!!!! Damnit what could a guy do,if girl won't believe any word of him!!!!!!! Slowly and slowly I started taking steps to go away from her.I began communicating less with her.In course of time a guy arrived and got after her like a maniac. Well he cleverly ered up her very close friends with time to such an extent that they began to sing praises of him in front of her.Well I never objected or asked her about that.Who Am I to ask??? and all time i could see him in her pro,flirting endlessly and talks full of ,lust and obsession.Well she has been a single girl just like me.Influenced by her elder friend,she made him her online bf.Well I could see her extremely happy with him. So I knew my time to leave has come. So I deleted my account from that website and made a misnomer account just all alone by myself probably thinking if I was too late. Well secretly I used to stalk her account and his new bf account to see how it was going?? And I was only startled.I could only see that dude bombarding her pro with ,xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx and xxxxxxxxxxx............ talks only. I knew it gonna end up quite devastingly.And similar thing happened.She resisted finally and he went mad cursing and saying bad things about her all around in her friends and other known ones crying that she played with him.Infact she got so mentally depressed that she deleted her account from that site too.Me!!!! I was moving along fine in my misnomer pro till one day i found a visit from her.I was flabbergasted.why she thought of saying hiiiiiiiiiii to me.I had left her already.How she came to know that probably it would be me. This time around I thought i will consider her as my friend only and everything went normal again. But I was wrong,i still loved her and it furthur began to grow but I was adamant not to let it slip coz of trauma that reckless guy gave her. One day she was quite sad and damn what happened to me that I went to her but she rather acted quite badly.At this point I lost my temper and said that she won't understand me ever.Well she demanded an explanation.i asked her to give me time to explain.Well so after this I again left thinking about writing everything what I been hiding.And I made it a point that if i don't recieve any reply over it,it gonna be my last and final message to her.Well i have prepared everything to tell her but she hasn't been showing any signs to know about the reality.So again it has been put on hold.Well I just love her.I don't hope to possess her.I know its impossible to get her.But that doesn't means I should stop loving her.I wanna enjoy her company as long as I can.Well we use to chat in pms earlier and still even now.Its for her only that come on that website.Time spent with her is something that's unaccountable. Perhaps a talk with her brings a cheer on my depressed and gloomy mind.If any girl listening or reading this,I ask them what should i do??? Is final goodbye an optimum solution for it.Maybe she knows the truth but doesn't wants to try again??? Of late i have started getting rude with girls and dangerously moving towards being a misogynist!!!!!!!